I'm dreaming of a white christmas
I sings these songs in harmony
I'm feeling empty and mistreat
Just because you're not here with me
I wonder how long it will take you
To finally make me free
Only to fall your prey and new
To a feeling of deeper dread
You are welcome but not to make me sad
I did invite you, don't feel guilty
Your faults are different and more hurtful
Because your reasons are unknown to me
I could have fought this by myself
It would have taken me my life long
In the bitter end, when looking back,
The ugliness would be the same
So why bother to ever feel love?
Why bother to ever even try?
I hate the pain, and I hate to cry!
terça-feira, 23 de dezembro de 2008
segunda-feira, 6 de outubro de 2008
Princess of my words
The who I am sitting here is not who I can be when you're near
I may see you on the morrow; but I'll never reach for you caged by my own sorrow
Instead I'll hold these literal moments close at hand and from you all your words demand
My touch on your skin may never be, but the words you speak call to me
A turn of phrase is a finger on my cheek. What you have to say thrills me then turns me weak
Though the physical distance is impossible to rise above that special name spoken just for me wraps me in a hug
Skin to skin never to be, but the words we speak fulfill part of me.
I may see you on the morrow; but I'll never reach for you caged by my own sorrow
Instead I'll hold these literal moments close at hand and from you all your words demand
My touch on your skin may never be, but the words you speak call to me
A turn of phrase is a finger on my cheek. What you have to say thrills me then turns me weak
Though the physical distance is impossible to rise above that special name spoken just for me wraps me in a hug
Skin to skin never to be, but the words we speak fulfill part of me.
Until it sleeps
I don't want to hurt anyone. Least of all me. Yes, it's mostly about me.
I just want to dream a different dream every night. I want my dreams at night to make up for the dispassionate days.
Don't be fooled to think I'm a loser. I'm not. But my kind of victories are the boring kind. Each accomplishment only adds to my world closing in.
I need room to breathe.
I want to live again and again the rush of tension building up.
I want butterflies to make home in my stomach and never cease to flutter.
I want the shudder of being touched for the first time.
I want you to want me when I want you to. And you can never fail...
...to capture my attention, to keep my interest, to amaze me and then to soothe me until I sleep.
I just want to dream a different dream every night. I want my dreams at night to make up for the dispassionate days.
Don't be fooled to think I'm a loser. I'm not. But my kind of victories are the boring kind. Each accomplishment only adds to my world closing in.
I need room to breathe.
I want to live again and again the rush of tension building up.
I want butterflies to make home in my stomach and never cease to flutter.
I want the shudder of being touched for the first time.
I want you to want me when I want you to. And you can never fail...
...to capture my attention, to keep my interest, to amaze me and then to soothe me until I sleep.
I will rise in perfect light
I will rise in perfect light,
Shining and oh so bright!
Look at me and wonder:
Couldn’t I’ve trusted her?
I have loved you forever.
You looked for another.
The road to me was there,
Yet it took you nowhere...
Leave it at rest they say,
But I strive to get my way.
Losing you is not an option,
My longing dictates my action.
I love your company,
And everlasting memory.
The ghostly presence...
The kiss, the embrace.
All of them are mine,
Given to me one time.
Presents wrapped in pain,
For a love given out in vain.
All good things come to an end
I see it’s granules of golden sand
languidly descending, in my hand
the crushed petals of the rose
and my valentine’s gift of prose
I hold my breath and listen
to the gentle rush of whisper
as you hold her hand and kiss
the brow of my rival, the abyss
slowly shaping in my life, a tease,
a taste of freedom, I don’t need this
another turn and I start again
breathing, watching the falling rain
slowly coming back to life
blossoming to my full height
I stand alone but fresh and revived
to be seen, loved and admired!
Loneliness (makes the loudest noise)
...the sound of your steps,
Echoing as when you left
Mine is the dread of the misfits
Forever in awe from your theft
Without my heart, without my wits.
Had you been here for long,
I would have overcome.
But your presence was a mist...
My longing is so much greater than that!
I mourn like it was death,
But there’s no grave to go back...
No escape, no defusing,
I’m forever your prisoner.
Enticed with the dream of you
Nurtured within my soul,
Fed by me solely... and the love that I (alone) sew...
Echoing as when you left
Mine is the dread of the misfits
Forever in awe from your theft
Without my heart, without my wits.
Had you been here for long,
I would have overcome.
But your presence was a mist...
My longing is so much greater than that!
I mourn like it was death,
But there’s no grave to go back...
No escape, no defusing,
I’m forever your prisoner.
Enticed with the dream of you
Nurtured within my soul,
Fed by me solely... and the love that I (alone) sew...
Left in my misery
Left in my misery
Abandoned to… what will it be?
Lying broken, shredded and stained.
Why would you do that?
Why would you leave at,
The gracious endeavour of my court?…
The luscious urge of my voice…
Couldn't wake you? Couldn’t take you?
I’ll struggle, I won’t back.
I forgive, I’ll react.
I gather strength for what comes next
Truly faded and a wreck,
A cautious stranger, a tried cat
All my will and power left
Aimed at giving the right enact
Ever hoping… for some respect.
Abandoned to… what will it be?
Lying broken, shredded and stained.
Why would you do that?
Why would you leave at,
The gracious endeavour of my court?…
The luscious urge of my voice…
Couldn't wake you? Couldn’t take you?
I’ll struggle, I won’t back.
I forgive, I’ll react.
I gather strength for what comes next
Truly faded and a wreck,
A cautious stranger, a tried cat
All my will and power left
Aimed at giving the right enact
Ever hoping… for some respect.
Someone stole my poet
Someone stole my poet
The one that was not mine
Someone stole my poet
And left me far behind
Someone stole my poet
I crave him even more
Someone stole my poet
It hurts to see him gone
Someone stole my poet
The orphan words are agony
Someone stole my poet
My bard’s heart is lonely
Someone stole my poet
And had every right to it
Someone stole my poet
I’m last years queen
domingo, 6 de julho de 2008
Noir
It was her first trip there and a dream come true. For her though, nothing was really a novelty because she had visited every place in New York, so many times, in movies, books, magazines, video clips, etc. that it was all pretty much engraved in her mind already.
Departure from Lisbon was peaceful. She had a long way ahead of her and the prospect of the many hours flying kept her emotions controlled. During the flight her concentration broke she was unable to eat, sleep or read. Her mind busy constructing and deconstructing fantasies...
This was suppose to be a work thing with a bonus – a big bonus because she had been granted permission to stay for a week on the cause of a two hour meeting for a contract that had already been decided anyway, her merit mind you. But a few weeks ago the stakes had gone really high…
Internet was her playground of election since debut working days after college. First the yahoo chats and a trip to posh Hungary with her girlfriend. After that came a series of MSN friends, a few blind dates and drinks at controlled environments, nothing more. The many hours online gave her the notion that every guy in the blue nowhere was either very ugly or very unfit in any possible way. Those she met turned out, as a rule, exactly what she wasn't looking for. Still she kept coming back for more. At times a particularly interesting subject would come along and put up a fight be in the end he could never live up to her expectation, or his own for a fact.
…Strange masks we put on to lure others into out web… step into my parlour, said the spider to the fly…
Either because people were trapped in boring activities or because they couldn't engage in other more fulfilling, the net was a great place for pretending to live a life of interest and glamour. Lately there was this thing called personal networking. Using 'the place for friends sites for boosting profiles had made it easy to find stars in the making, hungry for attention wannabes and the occasional genuine article.
Anyway, who was she kidding while digressing in this analysis? She was average enough herself, trapped in an often boring work and incapable of engaging in other more fulfilling activities, oh yeah she was l-a-z-y …
Him, on the contrary is a young successful model (well, a young successful everything!), and a great photographer on the making. Full of stars in his eyes. A wonderful kid when growing up, a straight A student, an angel face and the body of a well succeeded rapper. Perfection. Unreachable. Immune to the usual witty approach wouldn't react to any direct compliment. But he had been awake by politics, sociology, civil and human rights and the discussion of racial discrimination. Oh well, let it be known, our heroin can discuss that too, if it comes to it. It took her time and patience, God knows she had plenty of the first and little of the last, but the guy was so worth it. She was worth it… give to the universe and the universe will give you back in the same amount, bla, bla, bla…
La Guardia was such a disappointment, customs control, September never ending, boooooooring… but the hotel was something to recall. All was well in the world again. 9 O'clock sharp, after a 5 hours flight, 2 hours of customs procedures, a smelly taxi and hotel check-in she was absolutely ready for breakfast.
He was such a gentleman. Instead of sitting in the lobby, implying she would be late, he was standing at the front desk, jacket on and the neck scarf just a little undone on cause of the heating. He was gorgeous; smiled so affectionately that she smiled back unaware of the fact her face had lit from sheer unexpected happiness. She was ready to face any weather, traffic jam or smoke filled cafeteria!
The deal was for breakfast, just a friendly thing between two strangers in the real world who had happened to bump each other on the web.
But them he offered her his arm and they walked to his nearby home and studio. A trendy place, contemporary with a vintage touch. High ceilings and iron framed windows, polished floorboards and the faint smell of the fresh white paint. Designer furniture, scarce and well-chosen pieces of extremely good taste; a huge and eclectic CD collection, an electric bass guitar and amp; a huge black sofa, backed by the park view and every fixture and appliance a serious photographer would need. Cliché?
Breakfast was served. A genuine man prepared breakfast. Cold toasts, butter, milk and coffee, croissants. No sugar and no napkins.
Talking was easy.
Time passed.
An assistant, a girl model, a make-up artist and a hairdresser all gathered for the function. It was fascinating she had to admit it. The model was gifted and a pro, everyone knew his/her part. Three hours of intense work, not many words exchanged and he would take her picture every now and then always surprising her in her contemplative adoration of the scenario he completed.
He knew her as Noir.
=^.^=
Departure from Lisbon was peaceful. She had a long way ahead of her and the prospect of the many hours flying kept her emotions controlled. During the flight her concentration broke she was unable to eat, sleep or read. Her mind busy constructing and deconstructing fantasies...
This was suppose to be a work thing with a bonus – a big bonus because she had been granted permission to stay for a week on the cause of a two hour meeting for a contract that had already been decided anyway, her merit mind you. But a few weeks ago the stakes had gone really high…
Internet was her playground of election since debut working days after college. First the yahoo chats and a trip to posh Hungary with her girlfriend. After that came a series of MSN friends, a few blind dates and drinks at controlled environments, nothing more. The many hours online gave her the notion that every guy in the blue nowhere was either very ugly or very unfit in any possible way. Those she met turned out, as a rule, exactly what she wasn't looking for. Still she kept coming back for more. At times a particularly interesting subject would come along and put up a fight be in the end he could never live up to her expectation, or his own for a fact.
…Strange masks we put on to lure others into out web… step into my parlour, said the spider to the fly…
Either because people were trapped in boring activities or because they couldn't engage in other more fulfilling, the net was a great place for pretending to live a life of interest and glamour. Lately there was this thing called personal networking. Using 'the place for friends sites for boosting profiles had made it easy to find stars in the making, hungry for attention wannabes and the occasional genuine article.
Anyway, who was she kidding while digressing in this analysis? She was average enough herself, trapped in an often boring work and incapable of engaging in other more fulfilling activities, oh yeah she was l-a-z-y …
Him, on the contrary is a young successful model (well, a young successful everything!), and a great photographer on the making. Full of stars in his eyes. A wonderful kid when growing up, a straight A student, an angel face and the body of a well succeeded rapper. Perfection. Unreachable. Immune to the usual witty approach wouldn't react to any direct compliment. But he had been awake by politics, sociology, civil and human rights and the discussion of racial discrimination. Oh well, let it be known, our heroin can discuss that too, if it comes to it. It took her time and patience, God knows she had plenty of the first and little of the last, but the guy was so worth it. She was worth it… give to the universe and the universe will give you back in the same amount, bla, bla, bla…
La Guardia was such a disappointment, customs control, September never ending, boooooooring… but the hotel was something to recall. All was well in the world again. 9 O'clock sharp, after a 5 hours flight, 2 hours of customs procedures, a smelly taxi and hotel check-in she was absolutely ready for breakfast.
He was such a gentleman. Instead of sitting in the lobby, implying she would be late, he was standing at the front desk, jacket on and the neck scarf just a little undone on cause of the heating. He was gorgeous; smiled so affectionately that she smiled back unaware of the fact her face had lit from sheer unexpected happiness. She was ready to face any weather, traffic jam or smoke filled cafeteria!
The deal was for breakfast, just a friendly thing between two strangers in the real world who had happened to bump each other on the web.
But them he offered her his arm and they walked to his nearby home and studio. A trendy place, contemporary with a vintage touch. High ceilings and iron framed windows, polished floorboards and the faint smell of the fresh white paint. Designer furniture, scarce and well-chosen pieces of extremely good taste; a huge and eclectic CD collection, an electric bass guitar and amp; a huge black sofa, backed by the park view and every fixture and appliance a serious photographer would need. Cliché?
Breakfast was served. A genuine man prepared breakfast. Cold toasts, butter, milk and coffee, croissants. No sugar and no napkins.
Talking was easy.
Time passed.
An assistant, a girl model, a make-up artist and a hairdresser all gathered for the function. It was fascinating she had to admit it. The model was gifted and a pro, everyone knew his/her part. Three hours of intense work, not many words exchanged and he would take her picture every now and then always surprising her in her contemplative adoration of the scenario he completed.
He knew her as Noir.
=^.^=
Subscrever:
Mensagens (Atom)